(No running since 5/31).

Got an x-ray and there's a fracture in the fibula. I'm wearing this thing that goes up to my knee, it's removeable and it takes pretty much all the pressure of the leg. Monday I'll be going to the hospital for a bone scan to see what exactly is going on, then I'll see orthopedics on Wednesday to figure out what happens from there, but I'm probably done through the end of July.

I started lifting weights regularly, M-W-F. It's not in my personality to go without exercise.

Maybe by the end of August I'll be running every day and in October I'll be in full training. I don't know if the same walk-on deal is available for me for the indoor season but I'm pretty sure I won't be on the cross country team this year unless something amazing happens. I'll see.

Okay not much to write about but I'm waiting for a phone call so I figured I'd type something while I'm at it.

Mon 5/26 2.5mi hwoods orchard hill 18:43 (7:29). Mouth really dry; had 2 coffees at work. still went faster than last time.

Tue 5/27 3mi 21:22 (7:07). Was going for 4 but muscles around injury started really hurting.

Wed 5/28, Thu 5/29 Off.

Fri 5/30 CxT 30 mins hockey. Was going to run but after the leg hurt after playing hockey i didn't.

Sat 5/31 2mi 14:09 (7:05). Leg hurt.

June 1-9; Off. Lifted weights 6/3; 3 sets of 10 rep weight.

Finally seeing the doctor about this next Friday 6/13.

 

MON 1.5mi on track; 1 lap, 1 lap, 800m, 800m, leg went.

TUE 0.25mi 1 lap, leg wasn't good to run, stopped

WED/THU 0ff.

FRI 0.5mi no real workout but ran through the halls of the school for like 5 mins nonstop yelling and banging on lockers and such. This convinced me I would be ready to run on Saturday.

SAT 2.5mi 19:44 in homewoods to orchard hill rd and back.
It's been so long since I've been able to just go and run a hard, good tempo effort. I stretched out, laced the shoes tight, and took off into the woods. I probably started at about race pace for maybe a quarter mile before I settled down into tempo pace. I skipped over and about the rocks as I made my way down the hill and into the good part of the path. I was flying through, surprised that I felt as good as I did. I hit the half mile marker at about 4 minutes, which is a lot faster than I'd ever gone through that area before. I kept gliding towards the turnaround point. With the goal of 20 total minutes for the workout, I hit the turnaround at 9:30, right on pace considering going back included the hill. After the turnaround I felt slower than I had on the way out but I powered through. I could be making my leg worse, I could be shooting my muscles for the rest of the week... my right knee was aching. Still, I held pace. The main path was blazed and I headed up the hill. Never had the hill gone by so quickly. It seemed like a dominating climb, as I hit the straightaway with plenty left. I cruised at the aerobic threshold all the way back, the sun beating down my bare skin and sweat dripping down my forehead. As I crossed the invisible finish line and stopped the watch, I immediately basked in the glory of my first tempo run of the summer. The elation I felt reminded me of why I love running. Only those who have done it before will understand it now and do it again later. It's the happiest pain I'll ever go through and I wouldn't trade it in for anything.

SUN 4mi total
930AM 2mi tempo on S main st. a little faster than 8min pace? didn't have a watch.
8PM 2mi 16:22 easy in homewoods; about 1.75mi.

Week Total 9mi 2 actual days of running; hopefully that continues.

I'm back running again (sort-of). This is my log over the last month, which is basically the span of my injury from origin to now.

16 4.5 Meet vs Tantasqua- 2 mile 11:46, 4th.  Mile 5:32, 3rd. hurt ankle/leg 
17 5.75 39:27  5 woods medium +wu. [ankle/leg] 
18 3 27:21t  xc course easy +wu. [leg, knee] 
19 -   [?ankle/leg/tendon?] bike7.2 
20 -   [injury] 
21 4 Meet at Bartlett- 3200 11:51 2nd. 1600 6:18 4th. [injury], ankle, hot, no rest between. 
22 -   [injury] bike7.2 
23 -   [injury] bike3.6 
24 -   [injury] bike7.2 
25 -   [injury] walk4 
26 -   [injury] bike7.2 
27 -   [injury] bike3.6 
28 -   [injury] felt good on walk home-almost better 
29 -   [injury] probably good to run but no practice 
30 2 Meet at Grafton- Mile 5:38 2nd. [injury], 8 days off=slow time 
MAY 1 -   [injury] worse than before due to race; ice all day 
2 -   [injury] 
3 -   [injury] 
4 -   [injury] bike3.6 5 -   [injury] 
6 -   [injury] 
7 -   [injury] 
8 -   [injury] 
9 -   [injury] 
10 -   [injury] bike7.2 can start to walk. 
11 -   [injury] bike3.6  
12 -   ready to jog? 
13 -   ran around in gym-hurts but ok to jog a little 
14 -   can jog; not run. 
15 1.25   1 lap warmup, 2 800's. 
16 -   sick 
17 -   sick 
18 3 30:45  homewoods w/Neil

On the days there's actually something written, the columns go total miles/time/workout description. Also, about the bike-I didn't choose to cross train, the bike hurt my injury, but it was my only means of getting to and from work. Also, any day where it says 'bike', I was working too so that's probably about 3 miles of walking total during the day, and otherwise standing the whole time.

On the run today I was breathing pretty heavy throughout.. Wasn't going better than 8:30/mile at any point. I'm still a little sick and I'm coming off the biggest layoff from running in at least 2 years.

About 2 weeks ago I contacted the assistant coach for distance at UML, Nate Jenkins, inquiring about walking-on. He said I have to run between 10:00 to 10:10 2 mile by the end of the summer. He gave me a basic outline for training which is this;

At least 70mpw. Two-a-days every day except for Sunday. go easy/easy one day, easy/hard the next. On Sunday I start with a 1 hour long run and build up 10 minutes a week to 2:10, then I finish with a 400@ 2miGP. I'm supposed to build this up as much as possible and hopefully finish the 2:10 with a 5:00 mile or 7:30 2400 by the end of the summer. Also, because I'm following this traditional running week, my log weeks go Monday to Sunday, with the long run being the last run of the week. The training goes that way so it makes more sense to put it in that way.

At least once a week I do short hill repeats. These are 8 to 15 second all out sprints up the steepest hill I can find (luckily for me there's 2 awful ones within a 1.25mi of my house). I start out at 8 or 10 reps (something like that, I'll check the email again before my first one) then I add on a few each time I do the workout and I should be doing like 25+ repeats by the end of the summer. Once a week I do strides, 8 to 10 x100m (which I'll probably do as an easy workout because I defenitely don't see that as hard.) On the hard runs, I do a progression or tempo but either way it has to be HARD and AEROBIC.

I have to be able to run a 5min mile any time ("drunk, yup, hungover yup..."). 6min/mile is TRAINING-tempo run pace. 7min/mile is EASY running. 8min/mile or slower is shakeout.

How the hell am I going to do all of this? 2 simple reasons;
1. I love working hard.
2. I love running.

Coming off the injury I have to be careful as not to make it worse while I'm running again. I think I'm going to accomplish this by doing two-a-days immediately. So rather than put the leg through 6 miles, I'm putting it through 2 3-milers. I think thats going to be easier on the leg. As for this week I'm doing a couple miles until I can run without pain. I'm hoping it will still heal while I do this easy running, otherwise I'm going to need even more time off and there will be no way I'll come close to making the team.

So, once I can run once a day without pain in the leg, I'm immediately going to 2 a days and building up to that 70mpw as soon as possible. When I get to the 70 I'll maintain it for a couple of weeks and when I know I can, I'll increase. There's not too much I can say about it now because I guarantee something will happen between now and then. (I mean look, 40 days ago I thought that on Wednesday I'd be looking to break 5 mins in the mile. Now, on Wednesday I'll be looking to complete a 3 mile run without making my injury worse.) I'm really looking forward to this; honestly, I'm going to love doing this, but I just need all the help in the world to make this leg better.

Okay so 0mi running this week, 11 on the bike. Yesterday the leg started to feel as if it's actually doing something in the form of healing. I could walk without a limp today, more painful than before, but whatever I did to it to make it function in a way that I couldn't walk without limping on the ankle, it's healed.  I still feel pain when I press on the fibula firmly, but I think the pain should be gone within a few days and maybe I can start some real light jogging by the middle of the week, and get back to running next week? I'd like to be able to run in the SWCL meet on Wednesday and let that be my last HS race but if the leg isn't ready then theres no way I'll compete.

Tough way to go out; hurt myself the first meet in two subpar races, run slow with an injury in the heat the 2nd meet, then run taped and limping a slow mile in the 3rd meet after 8 days off.... not the way I saw the season going but nothing I can do about that now.

I'm really hoping that I can be at least jogging by the end of next week. After training mostly every day for months, 3 weeks off seems like an endless eternity. However, I feel that this has made me appreciate and love being able to run even more. I dont think I'll ever not want to go out for a run again, and if I do, all I'll need to get me out the door is the huge empty gap in my log where I wasn't able to run and would've done anything to be able to. If I'm able to run, I will, and I'll enjoy it.

Ran the race yesterday after 8 days off. Lots of tape on the ankle and finished the race with a limp in the stride. Couldn't walk after the race. Iced 10mins on/10mins off from when I got home to when I went to bed (3hrs). I'm taking today off from school so I can ice the ankle all day (I went 2.5hrs [10min on/10min off] earlier until I noticed the skin was staying red throughout the whole 10 minutes off, probably not a good sign so I took a break from it... I think I'm going to do 10min ICE/10min off for 2 hours then 1 hour completely off. Also, on a side note I think running the last 500m or so with a limp hurt my right knee, because well it hurts. But it's so small in comparison to my ankle I'm not worried about it. It'll heal well before my ankle.

Anyway, I've lost hope for the season. I think I can get back to running by the end of next week but I'm going to be so far out of shape that any racing I do is going to be slow and relatively meaningless. If I can get one more PR before I leave high school then cool, if not whatever. When I do get back to training, it's the start of my college buildup plan. My summer starts early. I'm actually not too mad about taking the time off because now I can kickstart the buildup plan. Also, I don't have to take time off between spring and summer and I think this allows me to race the 6K in June which I previously decided not to.

I've been communicating with Nate Jenkins, the assistant coach at UMass-Lowell (where I'll be in the Fall) who works with distance runners. He gave me an outline of what I'm going to have to do to walk on to the team. It's a lot of work and I'm looking forward to it a lot, which is why I'm being so dilligent on icing the ankle.

In the summer I will follow the schedule; easy/easy, then easy/hard from Mon-Sat, then a 2:10 long run on Sunday however I feel, with a 400m-building-up finish at GP for my 2mi time trial at the end of the summer. I'll have to run around 10:00 for the 2 mile the week before classes start.

When I get back to running, I'll be doing a jog 3-5mi before school every day, and as for the weekend it's treated like summer, so double on Saturday and long run on Sunday. For the long run I'll start up at at least an hour and add on 10 mins each week until I hit 2:10, then I start including those GP finishes.

Nate calls for 70+mi each week. I'm looking to build up as high as possible, I'd like to hit 100. I'm going to start off somewhere between 50-70mi the first week then just keep adding on between 5-10mi each week, as much as a I can handle.

Also I'm going to be working more hours in the summer. I've also been thinking about switching jobs, there's more options when you switch from 17 to 18 and have a HS diploma and are available the whole week without school/practice obligations. I thought about working nights but I don't think that would work out when I have road races, or when I go to school and have to flip my sleeping cycle over again.. I don't see myself working much in college so I need to make a ton of money while I can (IE; this summer).

In additon to working hopefully 40+ hours a week I'll be running hopefully 85+miles per week. I guarantee I'll go through many instances of being worn out and tired but I'm going to enjoy every second of it. I'm a little weird in the way that I like being tired. It's probably because I know that if I'm worn out, it means I've used my body well. The first few years of school for me I was like everyone else in the first week of practice; hadn't run for weeks, you come back and blast 3 mile tempo runs and you can't walk because the muscles are so sore. Except I loved that feeling. Weird, right? Well, that's me. I enjoy knowing I've done a good job.

And that's the plan.

Week Total: 4 miles running, 25mi on bike.

All days off except meet at Bartlett on Wednesday; 3200 in 11:51, 1600 in 6:18. (race details at website).

I don't know when exactly I did it but at some point last week I injured my ankle. It wasn't a sprain or anything clear, it doesn't even hurt but it's very weak and I can't really put weight on it because I know if I do it'll get worse and then probably start to hurt.

I first felt it before the first race on Wednesday 4/16. The two races made it clearly worse. I ran on it the next day in the woods and probably made it worse. The next day I took it real easy, ankle still not good. I took the weekend off trying to heal the sore legs and ankle for the meet Monday. It wasn't healed but I ran the races anyway. I thought I should've taped it for the racing but didn't (stupid decision), and the races left me limping pretty bad. So the next day I wasn't running but I was working the next three so was still on my feet all day, plus I have to ride my bike to and from work, 7 total miles plus about 3 miles walking just due to work, so not really rest. So after work (3mi walk, 7mi bike) T/W/T, on Friday between riding buses and walking for transportation to and from Worcester, I walked about 4 miles. Saturday (today) and Sunday (tommorow) I'm working again, so another 3mi walking each day, 7mi bike today, 3.5mi bike tommorow.

I've been icing the ankle 10mins on/off between 1-3 hours each night when I have the time to. The first couple days I didn't wrap it, but I've been wrapping the ankle with plenty of bandages, really limiting the weight put on it.

I feel it could've been healed by now if I wasn't forced to be on my feet all day but there's nothing I can do to change that; I need to work, and at least the bike riding is a bit of cross training.

I have a meet on Monday, another on Wednesday, then another on Saturday next week. Tough break with the ankle; this was going to be a fun week for racing. Anyway, I'm probably going to end up racing the mile in the meet Monday (no way am I going to test it over the distance of the 2 mile or the speed of the 800). If it feels good then I'll keep training and racing but all the training I've done the last 2 months, the base I've built, it's gone. It can't all evaporate that quickly but to say that just about a week off isn't going to severely deter the training plan, would be a lie.

Hopefully I still have enough left to keep my times going down for the rest of the season, but I don't think they will. This week off has eliminated my peak and now it's a rather elementry approach of getting better a few seconds at a time as the season goes on.

The bittersweet good news is that I probably won't get close to making the mark for the state qualifying meet, meaning the SWCL meet would be my last on W 5/21. I would take off the next 7 days, bringing me to Th 5/29. I'd probably do something easy on the Thursday and Friday, take Saturday off, and then I'm back to training seriously Sunday June 1st. Also, for now I've cancelled my plans to seriously race the 6/8 Worc. Firefighters Mem. 6K, as that gets in the way of my summer mileage building for college.

I'll stop the plans there because things can change so easily and theres no point in planning something I'm unsure of. (It's like the little boy planning on what he'll do at Disneyland only to find out the family is going on a cruise instead.)

 

I'm going to add two quotes in for this blog. This comes from the Apocrypha section of the Bible (neither Old Testament or New Testament), and can really pick you out of the dumpster. This really would've helped me a few years back when I temporarily lost faith in my religion, and it's helping me now.

My son, if thou come to serve the Lord, prepare thy soul for temptation. Set thy heart aright, and constantly endure, and make not haste in time of trouble. Cleave unto him, and depart not away, that thou mayest be increased at thy last end. Whatsoever is brought upon thee take cheerfully, and be patient when thou art changed to a low estate. For gold is tried in the fire, and acceptable men in the furnace of adversity. Believe in him, and he will help thee; order thy way aright, and trust in him. -Sirach 2, 1-6.

In addition, the following is Proverb 16:9 and is a big part of why I'm not freaking out about the injury. I just have to do my best and keep going at it, but no matter what I'm taking the LORD's path. Whether I like it or not, this injury is in God's plan and I must deal with it.

A man's heart deviseth his way: but the LORD directeth his steps.

Sun 11mi Total
7AM 5mi shakeout in homewoods, 54mins
11AM 6mi easy around hilly neighborhood, 63mins (10:30 pace)
+7pm hard bike uphill 3.5

Mon 8.5mi 6.5 to walmart/woods back. easy run 55:32, ~8:30pace. +1.5 wu/1.5cd. with john. legs tired first 4 miles of run (3 workouts yesterday after already being tired).

Tue 3.25mi easy 3mi run 25:47t, 8:33pace. +1 lap warmup. Pre-meet practice ran to the pizza shop with neil, ordered, ran about a mile and a half, then back to the pizza, ran it back to the school, ate it in front of the team.

Wed 4.5mi First meet of the season, Home vs Tantasqua
2 mile; 11:45 PR, 1 mile; 5:32. details at website.

Thu 5.75mi 39:27 in woods with 0.75wu. me and neil started off goin easy but the weather was warm, good, we took off the shirts about a mile in.. we probably started going at about a 9, then a 8:30, then we likely came in with 7:30s or something like that.

Fri 3mi 27:21t warmup+xc course all pretty easy. pretty hot.

Sat 0ff +bike 7.2; pretty good bike ride.

Week Total: 36 miles run, 11 miles on bike.

3 workouts on Sunday not really a good idea; 2 easy runs plus blasting up a hill on a bike after working.. I honestly should've been taking an easy day. Then I went slow Monday, Tuesday was a pre-meet day.. Wednesday was an okay first meet I suppose. I expect to run much faster but I have an explanation for that later. I think I hurt my ankle in the 2 mile, it was hurting after that race and it's hurt since. Well, it doesn't really 'hurt' but it feels weak and I have a slight limp.  Thursday felt good for the muscles and everything but didn't do anything good or bad to the ankle. Then Friday both ankles, my knee, and entire body were all feeling sore so I went easy in the heat. Coach recommended taking the weekend off completely so all I've done so far is ride the bike to and from work.

I've worked my body harder than ever the past 9 weeks. I took 1 week off after the indoor season then catapulted myself into hard training. Each week for about a month was my highest mileage week total ever. Now, my body is so worn down from all of it, it's going to take a while before I feel the full effect of the training. It's like, if I take an easy day today, when I go back hard tommorow, I'm only feeling the benefits of the last week. I ran that first meet tired.

I cancelled my plan to go for 70 miles in a week this season. I feel I'll have plenty of time in the summer to build up to college XC mileage even with a high of 55 this season. I'll probably even decide not to do the Worcester Firefighter's 6K in June, just to give myself more time to build. All I know now is that if I continue to extend my mileage, my whole entire season will be useless for racing. I don't want to do that. I don't want to make myself so tired that I peak after the season is over and have no races to see what the training has done for me. I'm done with the endurance phase. I'm starting long intervals now. I'm starting my recovery now. I've got some really fast races ready in these legs but I'll need to rest in order for them to come out.

Sun, Mon; Off sick. saw no point in running other than logging stupid mileage; decided to rest so i could get back to running as soon as possible.

Tue 7mi easy 1:07:11 in woods. still sick.

Wed 8mi 6mi tempo 45:20 (7:33). 1wu/1cd. still a little sick but went pretty fast.

Thu 5mi 3xMile tempo 6:14/6:06/6:10 with 1 lap, plus full recovery between each. 1wu/cd. 65+degrees, felt real hot, thirsty. didn't feel fast, wasn't.

Fri 9.5mi 1:27 long run using hodges village damn trails that i couldn't measure. beautful trail though.

Sat 2mi 23:47 shakeout in home woods. +bike 7.2mi. very tired legs from last 3 days.

Week Total: 31 miles 7mi on bike.

Tough week to log mileage in with the 2 days off from being sick. Even Tuesday I think took the toll of a long run on my body because I was still sick then. Then Wednesday I did a fast 6mi tempo without being fully recovered, then mile intervals in the heat, then probably the longest run of my life. Tough week on the body, doesn't really show in the mileage though.

I'm going really work myself to get the mileage goals the next two weeks. After that I don't really care about mileage, I'll be focused on racing in the meets. First meet next week though, I'm looking forward to that.

I posted this as a comment on Nate Jenkins' blog as a response to questions about mental toughness.

i'm not an elite runner (yet) or Nate, but i have some thoughts on the injuries and the mental drive. gone

i had a 2 year stretch of seemingly nonstop alternating injuries; mostly shin splints, plus pain on the side of the knee, and i sprained my ankle once. in that span i became very frustrated and some people might've even stopped running after all those injuries, but i kept going because i knew why i was doing it; i love running and i want to improve and i will not let anything stand in my way. for example, when i had the pain on the side of my knee the 2nd time, i knee it wasn't an injury, but just an ache. i knew it'd go away. in the 3 weeks it took the pain to go away, it would've been easy to say "knee hurts, i'm stopping", but i didn't. i kept going because i knew that i'd be satisfied with what i'd done and that satisfaction heavily outweighs the pain.

also, it may help to have a type of role model for the situation. when i was a freshman, i was friends with the senior captain who had won a state championship in the indoor 600m. during the outdoor season his lower legs got real bad and i think he either got a stress fracture or got very close to one. with the knowledge of that, how could anyone feel right about skipping a workout for a minor ache? how could you see a guy work his legs to fracture, then go and take the easy way out? you might use your teammate, Nate, or anyone else to note this. maybe you'll think of Brett Favre or Cal Ripken Jr. who knows, maybe you don't need to look at anyone but yourself. whatever it takes, if you have an 'injury' that you can train through, then do it. don't let yourself take the easy way out.

about training in NE weather, it's sort of the same deal. I have some hardcore first hand experience in this. i've run in snowstorms with the whole course covered by at least an inch of snow, i've run in a singlet in 20 degree weather, i've run through downpours where there's more water falling down than there is in your shower, i've run when the wind was blowing me over, and i've run in 95 degree heat where i was slowed down by nearly 2 minutes/mile for my 3 mile tempo run. 
you have to remind yourself that you're not out there to enjoy the weather. you're out there to train. you're not out there to enjoy yourself, you're out there to do work. in order to get out in the crappy conditions, you just have to think about why, and what you'd be doing it for. when you're absolutely serious at training and improving, it's easier to get out there. same principle goes for getting out when you don't feel good.

and for racing and training through fatigue/burning/pain/the worst enjoyment of your life:

the drive comes from many different places. for some, it's their coach yelling at them to 'f****** go!". for others, they have to prove something to those who are watching. some find the drive from their desire to win, or beat another runner. some find the drive because they are so focused on their goal time.
some find the drive for the entire race before it even starts; they see it to it's end. when the gun goes off, they are absolutely committed to the task of reaching the finish line.

mantras are probably the most frequently used form. but they'll only work if you find what gets you going. maybe you get too tense or nervous late in the race, and "stay relaxed" is yours. maybe you get too relaxed and "focus" is yours. maybe you lose the drive halfway through the race, and "all the way" is yours. maybe you know you'll feel awful if you dont hit your goal time, so you need to tell yourself "hit the time" over and over. maybe you need "beat him". maybe you're lacking strength, and you'll need to tell yourself to "power through".

personally, i know what disappoints me after a race. i know what i'm out there for. i know if i want to hit a time goal, and i don't, i'll be mad, so during the race i'll wrap my mind around the time, and the effort i know it takes to reach it. maybe my team needs points in the meet so i wrap my mind around beating the other team's runners. maybe i'm facing intense pain, and i need to tell myself to suck it up and stop being a wimp, because i know when i finish, if i haven't given the race my all, i will be disappointed.

getting through injuries, getting into the weather, and getting through the race all depends on giving yourself a reason to do it. if you're stocking shelves for a job, and your boss tells you that if you don't finish the pet food section by 5pm you'll be fired, and you don't care about the job, then at 5:02 the pet food section won't be finished. on the other hand, if you're living your dream job by working in a tall office building in new york city, and your boss asks you to have a report ready for him by the end of the hour, then you're going to make sure you have it done by then.

if you don't actually care about what you do as a runner, then you can't expect to have the drive to do what it takes to become a better athlete. however, if you're certain of what you want to do and what you want to do is be the best runner your body is capable of being, then you should have no trouble finding the will to do what it takes. it comes from within.